An empowering RNT journey of a woman’s life after divorce
Amisha’s marriage ended in 2019. She was married for 3 months. All her hopes and dreams that she had for her new life came crashing down around her. Although broken and upset Amisha knew that this marriage was not meant for her, she refused to sacrifice her happiness just to live up to society’s expectations. She had the strength of mind to stand up for what she believed was right for herself.
“My motto has always been, whatever you choose to do, make sure you are happy doing it because life’s too short. Luckily, I have a very supportive family and they had my back. They understood where I was coming from and agreed with me when I said a relationship has to be empowering for it to work.”
Plagued by Self Doubt
Although she knew that her decision to end the marriage was the right thing to do, Amisha still questioned herself. She started questioning her self worth and her self-esteem. She questioned her choices, wishing she had paid better attention to the signals she had picked up before the wedding. In hindsight she felt she should have been more cautious before rushing into a marriage.
This lack of self-confidence has been a constant undercurrent throughout her life. Even today she sometimes hears voices in her head that pull her down, making her feel small.
“I have never had very high self esteem. When I was a little girl I was always overweight. Food was like a comfort, I reached for it everytime I felt down. When my father moved to London from Africa life was tough, we didn’t have a lot of money. I remember when we bought our house we didn’t have any carpets for a long time as we couldn’t afford it. But there was always food, plenty of food. And of course, I was always teased about my weight and about my looks.”
Why Yo-Yo Diets Fail
This early association with food meant that Amisha turned to food when she was upset. Her appearance was always commented on and she was often teased and made to feel bad about her body. At 16 she decided to take some control into her life and started to diet to try and control her weight. She joined the gym and started to work out 6 days a week. Amisha forced herself to limit the amount of food she ate during the week and on the weekends she allowed herself to eat whatever she felt like. Not realising that all the hard work she put in was being completely negated by her lack of structure.
“Looking back I realise I had hardly any energy. I felt weak and tired all the time, and it’s no wonder as I was working out excessively and barely eating. But my weekend dinner treats meant that I was stuck at a permanent plateau.”
After her divorce, Amisha felt her self esteem was at an all time low, she thought the only way she could feel better was if she could have a flat stomach. She believed that a flat stomach would make her look good and that meant that she would also feel really good about herself.
“I even contemplated surgery. I had tried so many things - diets, took up boxing, I made sure I ate a lot of fruit and veg but nothing worked and I was convinced that I could never have a flat stomach by working out. The only way I could have that body image I so craved was if I had surgery, And then I discovered RNT.”
After 4 months of research, reading RNT case studies and listening to Akash’s podcasts Amisha decided to sign up and join the RNT family.
“I told myself, I’ll try RNT and then if that doesn’t work, I’ll go under the knife. I am so glad I joined RNT! When I look at myself in the mirror now, I am still amazed. I can’t believe that I managed to achieve this. I am so glad I didn’t go through with surgery. I am sure that without The Process Phase and the dark moments of The Grind I wouldn’t have this new found surge of confidence.”
Walking the RNT Walk
Going through the tasks, meeting all your checkpoints can really push your limits. Pushing yourself to walk 20,000 steps a day, doing 45 mins cardio sessions every day, plus 4 full body workouts a week. Add meal prepping and work to the equation, and you realise you have to become so minimalistic in your priorities. Those dark and intense moments can really make you question your motivations and that is exactly what happened with Amisha.
“I had to constantly remind myself that I was choosing to do this for myself. No one was forcing me to do this. This was my mission and mine alone. The changes in my physique caused such a surge in my self confidence and even though it was winter and cold and horrible outside, I got out there and did my steps and hit the gym.”
Investment Phase and Beyond
The next part of Amisha’s journey held some valuable lessons for her on how to manipulate her macros and her calories to ensure that she could be in the shape of her life, for life. She had the confidence to play around with the meal plan so she could eat a varied diet that she found satisfying while still keeping to the structure.
A big revelation was Amisha’s love for lifting weights. She loves RDLs (Romanian Deadlifts). Going to the gym with her plans and her book with her target numbers is part and parcel of her routine and the weight’s room is a place she feels comfortable and powerful.
“I am loving my life now, I love my new body and I love this surge of self confidence. I also find that I don’t even need to look at myself in the mirror that much anymore. I think before, I needed to look in the mirror to reassure myself that I look ok, that my stomach doesn’t look that big or my arms don’t look flabby. Now I know, I know I look great and so I don’t need that constant reassurance.I don’t question it anymore.”
If you are inspired by Amisha’s journey and want to hear more you can listen to her conversation with Akash on the RNT podcast (Episode 205). Tune in to listen to how Amisha managed to quieten those negative voices in her head and to rise above them with her new found confidence.
Watch Amisha’s podcast video here.